Movie Madness
by Tagi
Summary: General chaos and mayhem as Schwarz and Weiss meet up at the movies...one happy couple, one crying assasin, one psychopath with a lethal straw? Please Read and Review and enjoy! ^_^


"I'm hungry!"  
  
Ken whined to his fellow team members. Omi was typing madly away at his laptop, Yohji was smoking a cigarette, and Aya was polishing his katana with a very odd glint in his eyes. Creepy.  
  
"Then go eat something Ken-Kun."  
  
"Yohji, its not that simple! We have nothing in the fridge. Aren't any of you going to eat anything?"  
  
Aya pondered. Maybe he would be hungry. Maybe.  
  
"I am getting kinda hungry," Omi said. "Yohji, go to the grocery store and get us ramen noodles please," Omi asked Yohji with big puppy dog eyes. "Please?'  
  
"Don't get all genki on me Omi. If you guys are hungry go out to dinner. I'll come!" He always came up with the best ideas he thought to himself.  
  
"Ok, where do you want to go Omi?"  
  
"Aya! Why does he get to choose?"  
  
"Yohji stop whining," Ken said.  
  
"Ok, how about that American restaurant down town?" Omi suggested.  
  
"Ugh no! Not American food! How about the Shabu-Shabu restaurant across the street?" Ken suggested hopefully. Only to have his idea rejected.  
  
"No! Lets go to the French place across town. They have this really hot waiter there. One time on a date I-." Yohji had been interrupted.  
  
"No, we will all go to the Italian restaurant five miles from here? Anyone against my idea?" Aya glared. Omi thought to himself, "With a look like that I don't think anyone would disagree. Aya could be very creepy at times."  
  
Aya, obviously happy about getting his way said, "Okay. Now we will leave in ten minutes. Yohji make a reservation. Ken get the car. And Omi, just get ready."  
  
"Okay!!!"  
  
Omi was excited. He hadn't been out to eat for a lonnnnggg time. Not since his last date with- no, he should stop thinking about that. They were over.  
  
"What's wrong chibi?" Yohji had strolled back in to the room. "Nothing!" Omi said cheerfully.  
  
"You guys!" Ken screamed from his room upstairs. "Come up here quick!!!"  
  
Yohji and Omi darted upstairs, clearly thinking something was wrong.  
  
"Should I wear the orange sweater around my waist or should I try a nice blue one instead?"  
  
"Ughh!!!" Yohji was throttling Ken in an instant. "You made us come up here for fashion advice? What are you a girl or a guy? Next your going to be asking us if your pants make your butt look big!" Yohji sighed and walked downstairs.  
  
Ken looked at his backside and said quietly, "Omi? Do they?"  
  
"Do they what?"  
  
"Do they made my butt look big?"  
  
"Oh God, Ken! Who cares!" He walked downstairs then leaving a very self- conscious Ken looking at himself in the mirror.  
  
"Ken is getting weirder and weirder!" Yohji declared and threw himself down on the couch.  
  
"Yea I know. He's getting more vain everyday! He's been hanging out with you too much Yohji!" Omi said, dodging a kick from Yohji. Aya then came in the room.  
  
"Aya? Am I vain?"  
  
"He is isn't he?" Omi asked, receiving a glare from Yohji.  
  
Yohji looked sad at the thought and asked Aya again. "Am I? Do you think so?"  
  
"Of course you are, Yohji" Aya said, trying to be comforting. But he failed. Aya just couldn't really be comforting, especially to Yohji.  
  
Yohji sauntered out of the room and screamed, "Fine! I'll be in the car!"  
  
"Wow. He's dramatic."  
  
"Yea. How long do you think we should leave him in the car for?" Aya asked right when Ken came down. He was wearing his original orange sweater.  
  
"Ready to go?"  
  
"Yea."  
  
They all then got situated in the car and started for the Restaurant.  
  
Over at the Schwartz apartment the same predicament was going on.  
  
"Brad!!!" Schu whined.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm hungry! Take me out!!!"  
  
"No."  
  
"Your soo mean Bradddy!"  
  
"Thanks," Brad retorted.  
  
Then Schu got an idea.  
  
//If you don't take us out I will send all of Weiss a mental picture of you in you Barbie pajamas.//  
  
//What????//  
  
//You know I would//  
  
"Nagi, Farfello?"  
  
Nagi looked up and Farfello's single eyes swept over Brad.  
  
"We are going out to dinner. Where would you guys like to go?"  
  
"Ohh Ohh! I know! I know! How about Italian! Pleasseee!?" Schu asked, thoroughly annoying Brad.  
  
"No. Most Italians are Christian. And they believe in God. God lovers." Farfello said to Schu's suggestion.  
  
They all stared at him.  
  
"How about French?" Nagi suggested.  
  
"No! Italian!"  
  
"Well I think I will let Nagi decide." Brad said, smirking evilly. "Where do you want to go Nagi?"  
  
//If you do not pick Italian I will tell Tot about you secret love//  
  
//Who cares. I never really liked her. Just infatuated with her innocence. I was planning to dump her next week.//  
  
//Fine, then I will tell Brad who you dated once and who you still lovveeee!//  
  
"Brad Nagi lov-"  
  
"ITALIAN!" Nagi screamed, interrupting Schu.  
  
//Smart move Chibi.//  
  
//Don't call me Chibi//  
  
//Okay Nagster//  
  
//Don't call me Nagster unless.//  
  
//Unless what?//  
  
//See that wall?//  
  
// Yea.//  
  
//Unless you want an imprint of you in that wall I wouldn't call me that//  
  
//Oh.//  
  
"Well you heard Nagi! We are going to Italian! Yes! How about that place nearby?" Schu asked.  
  
Brad reluctantly nodded his head. Everybody got in the car. They arrived five minutes after Weiss did.  
  
Weiss had finally managed to get to the restaurant after Ken had a huge fight with Yohji because Ken had the misfortune to agree and call him vain. He never knew Yohji was so touchy about it.  
  
"Right this way sir," The waitress said to Aya and she led them to a four person table in the front of the restaurant.  
  
"I will be with you in a moment." She then departed. "Umm. Aya?" Omi said, looking kind of worried.  
  
"What Omi?"  
  
"Look who just walked in the door."  
  
They all looked up to see a very pissed off Brad Crawford, a happy looking Schuldrich, a bored Nagi, and a very homicidal Farfello.  
  
"No! We are not being in the same restaurant as them! Farfello bit my arm and gave me a nasty infection last time I saw him, remember?" Ken said eyeing the physco.  
  
"Yea, ok. As soon as they sit down we will leave, k?" Aya said. Fearing for the safety of his team. He hadn't brought his katana!  
  
"Sir, please sit here," a young waiter said. "Would you like a kid' menu?" He asked Nagi, who in return gave him an icy glare and said no. As they passed Schu muttered to the waiter, "He would like one actually."  
  
The waiter passed out menus and gave Nagi a kid's menu. He glared. This waiter was really asking for it. Nagi telekinetically moved the waiter's notepad all around the room. He laughed to himself. He would get the waiter for calling him a child.  
  
"Nagi what are you going to get?" Schu asked.  
  
Nagi was about to say kid's menu chicken fingers when the waiter came over and Brad asked a question.  
  
"Your name is very interesting. It's in Italian right? What does it mean?"  
  
"Oh, let me check. But in the meantime can I take your drink order?"  
  
"Yea," Brad answered. "Can I have the chardonnay-."  
  
Brad was interrupted.  
  
"Can I see your id mister?" The waiter's high pitched voice cracked when asking.  
  
Brad glared an "If this wasn't a public place you'd die now" look.  
  
"Chardonnay? Sure, it'll be out in a moment!" The waiter then scurried off.  
  
Weiss had just escaped out the door when Yohji asked a good question.  
  
"What are we going to do now?"  
  
"Bowling!"  
  
"Let's visit my sister!"  
  
"A movie!"  
  
"Ok Omi, movie it is! Lets go!" Yohji said cheerfully as he headed for the car.  
  
Schu looked up and thought for a moment then..  
  
//Brad?//  
  
//Yes.//  
  
//Guess who was just here and is now going to a movie?//  
  
//Who?// Brad was beginning to get interesting.  
  
//Our favorite little kittens of course.//  
  
They both eyed each other and scary smirk formed on both their faces.  
  
"You know what? Let's leave here. Let's go see a movie!"  
  
"Ok," Nagi said. He really didn't care. He was already bored.  
  
So they started to walk out when their waiter shouted to them.  
  
"Sir? I asked and they said it meant rat's ass!"  
  
Brad stared. What a funny name. Probably because that was what the food was made from. Brad made a mental note not to come back here. It did smell funny now that he thought about it.  
  
Ken, Omi, Aya, and Yohji had finally made it to the movies after a twenty minute delay. They had to agree on what movie to see. Ken had suggested Harry Potter. His soccer kids had said that the book was good so he figured the movie would be too. Aya suggested Lord of the Rings, he thought that Orlando Bloom as really hott and that Elijah wasn't so bad either. Omi suggested Lilo an Stitch, but they all ignored him. They finally all decided on Signs. They all agreed when they saw that Mel Gibson was in it.  
  
Schwartz sauntered into the Cineplex and decided to see Signs. They got there faster than Weiss and already were sitting down when Weiss entered the theater with popcorn and candy. Ken wanted to sit in the middle so he lead Weiss to a row that already had four people in it. It was dark so he couldn't see what four people. During the previews Ken decided that he wanted to go to the bathroom so, knowing that if he asked any team member to hold his candy that it would be gone when he came back, he decided to ask the person sitting next to him. "Umm, excuse me, can you-?"  
  
He as cut off in shock as he realized who it was.  
  
"Why hello kitty!"  
  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Ken's candy flew in the air and landed over everyone.  
  
Some disgruntled movie goer screamed at him, "Hey watch it you dumass!"  
  
"Sorry!" Ken muttered and sat down.  
  
//Hello//  
  
//Ahh! Get out of me head!//  
  
//Oh but Ken! I don't want to.//  
  
//What are you doing here anyway, I mean weren't you at the restaurant? How many of you are there?// Ken was beginning to get scared. What if there was more than one version of Schwartz?  
  
//Just one.//  
  
With that Schu left his head alone.  
  
Omi, Aya, and Yohji, realizing it was Shuldrich and his "posse" decided to move seats. So did Schwartz. Brad sat right night to Aya, Schu sat right next Yohji, Nagi sat right next to Omi, and Farfie sat right next to a very disgruntled Ken.  
  
Ken was just watching the movie when he felt a sharp object digging in to his arm. He turned to find Farfello carving something in to his arm with his drinking straw.  
  
"Ah! Get off!" Ken pulled away.  
  
"Ahh the power of the straw. Not only can you drink blood out of it, you can carve in people, chew on it, and you can poke people with it!" Farfello then proceeded to poke Ken, for the duration of the movie.  
  
Omi and Nagi just stared at each other.  
  
"How can I keep this façade up? How can I pretend that I don't like him anymore?" Nagi thought to himself.  
  
"He's so perfect and beautiful!" Omi thought to himself.  
  
"I just cant live like this anymore, why did we break up anyway?" Oh right. Nagi then remembered.  
  
"Why did Tot have to come? She wasn't special, but Nagi just seemed to like her immatureness and her stupidity." He thought to himself. Omi hated her so much. He missed his Nagi.  
  
Screw Tot! Nagi would not let Omi get away a second time.  
  
"Omi?" Nagi screwed up his courage to ask his love.  
  
The angel speaks! "Yes Nagi?"  
  
"I'm sorry. You meant more to me than Tot ever did." He turned away, afraid of Omi's reaction.  
  
Omi's heart leapt. Yess!!!!!! Now he wouldn't have to stab Rabbi-Chan repeatidly. Well he decided he should anyway, just for fun.  
  
"Oh Nagi! I missed you soo much!" Omi then proceeded to hug Nagi.  
  
Nagi seemed very flustered. But happy.  
  
"Oh how sweet," Schu thought sarcastically. Well at least things were going well for Nagi but his consistent whispering was just not bothering Yohji! Then Schu picked up on something while eavesdropping on Yohji's mind. And he decided to make fun of him for it.  
  
"Yohji?"  
  
The brunette turned toward Schu. "What?"  
  
"Do you think you're pretty? Wait of course you do. Because you are VAIN!"  
  
//VAIN VAIN VAIN!! DO you ever think of anyone else. Or only yourself!//  
  
Yohji looked near tears so Schu decided to say, "VAIN!"  
  
Yohji ran out of the theater. He decided he was better off in the bathroom. He knew he was pretty. Was it so bad that he acknowledged it?  
  
Schu smiled happily. He had accomplished his mission! Now he could settle down and watch Mel try to kill aliens.  
  
"This movie is so stupid." Brad muttered. "Aliens still can read your brain when you wear tin foil hats. I know! I've tried it with Schuldrich."  
  
"Yea," Aya agreed, "This movie is unrealistic. But atleast I don't have to listen to anyone when watching. At least they are all silent."  
  
"You think you got it bad?" Brad asked.  
  
"Yea! I live with two teens and a hentai!"  
  
"Well I live with a mean German, a psychopathic Irishman, and sadistic computer loving teenage prodigy!"  
  
They both then proceeded to look back at Omi and Nagi to find them kissing.  
  
"Eww! No! Bad Omi!" Brad said.  
  
"Bad Omi? You mean bad Nagi. He's the one putting on all the moves on poor Omi." Aya said defensively.  
  
"No! Omi likes Nagi, Nagi doesn't like Omi!"  
  
"NO!"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"NO!"  
  
"YES!"  
  
"SHUT UP!" A movie watcher screamed at all the noise.  
  
Brad proceeded to punch out the man. He was annoying him.  
  
Yohji was still sobbing in the bathroom stall. Schu was beginning to feel something he had never felt before. He was beginning to bad! Odd... He decided to go to the bathroom and actually comfort Yohji! What was wrong with him? Was it love? No! NO! He didn't love, so maybe he was just sick or something. Whatever it was he got up to go to the bathroom. Aya and Brad were still arguing and Nagi and Omi, still kissing.  
  
Ken was trying to block out everything but he snapped.  
  
"If you don't stop poking me with that straw I will slit your throat you miserable creature of Hell!!!!" Ken screamed at Farfello who looked taken aback.  
  
Wow! Ken must be nice or something because he was annoying him and he still complimented Farfello. "He thinks I'm a miserable creature of Hell. He's soo sweet!" Farfello thought to himself. S  
  
Farfello had stopped poking Ken and They both just watched the movie peacefully until a scary part came on. Ken gasped in freight. Then Farfello did the same. Then Ken did it again and louder and so did Farfie. It became a contest. Farfello was winning and everyone in the audience except Ken was thoroughly annoyed.  
  
"Ah"  
  
"Ahh"  
  
"Ahhh"  
  
"AH"  
  
"AHH"  
  
And so it continued until..  
  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"  
  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"  
  
They both stopped when they found it hard to breathe. Farfie, having amazing breathe control, won the contest.  
  
"Damn," Ken said in between gasps. He had lost. Oh phooey.  
  
Yohji looked up when he heard someone enter.  
  
//Hello.//  
  
//*sniffle sniffle* hi//  
  
//What's wrong?//  
  
//Am I really vain?//  
  
//Why do you care?//  
  
//I don't know. Because I am perfect and perfect people aren't vain. I know that I am good looking doesn't mean I am vain. Do you think I am good looking?// Heheheh, Yohji thought to himself. Maybe he could use this situation to make Schu say that he is handsome and then he could tell everyone that Schu liked him and then he would get him back for making him run out of the theater like an idiot!! HAHAHHAHHAHAH. Yohji was soo smart. And not vain. At all. Just incredibly smart.  
  
"I heard that!" Schu said.  
  
"Heard what?" Yohji tried to play it innocent.  
  
"You were trying to get me back for called you vain, which ISNT even a diss! And there I was ACTUALLY worrying about you! You are mean!!" Schu said.  
  
"Oh Schu-Schu! You do care!" Then Yohji proceeded to glomp an unexpecting Schu. What a cute couple!  
  
"NO!"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
After twenty minutes Aya and Brad were still fighting. They didn't even realize that Nagi and Omi had stopped kissing and were watching them fight, or that everyone else in the theater were planning their deaths for being so loud.  
  
Ken and Farfello were still trying to catch their breathes.  
  
"I think I hacked up a lung. Do you see one anywhere on the ground?" Farfello asked Ken who was gasping for air.  
  
"Not that I can see."  
  
"Oh."  
  
//Brad?//  
  
//Yea Schu? Where are you?//  
  
//Me and Yohji are going to a club. I'll be home at three or so, tell Aya when Yohji will get back.//  
  
//What?!?// Brad asked, but Schu had gone. Great just great!  
  
"Aya?"  
  
"Yes.."  
  
"Yohji and Schu have gone out to a club and will get back at three in the morning after probably a lot of alcohol consumption, drug use, and sex." Brad answered very seriously.  
  
"Oh. Ewww. Yohji and Schuldrich? Ewwww."  
  
Wow! Omi was amazed. He had never heard Aya say "EWW" before in his life. Hahahhahha.  
  
The movie finally ended and everyone got up to leave, some cursing off Brad and Aya on the way out.  
  
"That movie sucked!!" Farfello screamed, getting bad looks from passerbyers.  
  
Ken looked at him questioningly. He didn't even know Farfello was paying attention to the movie.  
  
"Insulting movies that other people seem to like hurts God." He told Ken.  
  
"Oh. That explains it."  
  
"See? Wasn't that great?" Omi asked Nagi.  
  
"Yea! Everybody seemed to get along!" Nagi said. He and Omi HAD to plan these things more often. They were just so much fun!!  
  
~*~*~ -Owari ~*~* 


End file.
